Pissing Pillows
by A Ravens Dream
Summary: One shot collection of Kakuzu and Hidan and all the awkward and funny situations of their relationship. Lots of language, lots of implied sex, actual sex, lots of humor, lots of fluff. Taking requests for this story! *marked incomplete until out of ideas, please leave requests!*
1. Pissing Pillows

I don't even know. I've tried for a long time trying to figure out what to type but nothing has come. So we'll see where this takes us.

As of right now, this is the only thing on my screen. This and the words up there. I don't know what I'm doing. After a whole year you'd think I've gotten some sort creativity. LOLNO.

/shot

**M for Hidans mouth**

**Fluff at the end**

**OOC in all characters**

**Pissing Pillows!**

"Fuck you, you piece of cock whore bitch!" I grabbed the wad of money, crushing many of the green pieces of shit, and threw them on the ground, the paper spilling all over the floor. I at my teammate. "Go fuck your Jashin damned self!" Kakuzu's green eyes narrowed. I snarled at him and turned on my heel, walking out the room, making sure the door nearly fell of it's hinges when I slammed it shut. Cock sucking bastard.

I stormed my way down the halls of the Akatsuki base, stomping my feet extra loud to piss everyone else off. I can't believe that bitch. All he does is pay attention to his fucking money. If he'd actually act like he fucking "loved" me, then this shit wouldn't be happening. Fuck him, fuck his money. I'll piss on it and put it in his damned pillow.

I walked, er, stomped, to the kitchen and slumped down in one of the chairs at the table. Deidara was also in there eating some of his fruity cereal. He glanced at me, then smiled with a mouth full of multicolored bites of cereal.

"Hey, Hidan," he said spewing food all over the table. I glared at the chewed up food. Even I'm not that disgusting.

"Sup, bitch? Actually, nevermind. Don't talk, just eat," I said eyeing the food on the table.

"What's got your panties in a twist?" Deidara said, actually taking time to breathe before he went to grab another bite of cereal.

"Fucking Kakuzu!" I said my anger coming back. Deidara rolled his eyes, er, eye, and said,

"What happened, un?" I slammed my fist on the table.

"If that bastard wouldn't spend so much damn time counting and loving his money, then I wouldn't be so pissed off! All the asshole ever does is sit there and wonder how much he'll make off of this shit faces head or this guys fucking fingernails or some shit like that! It's always about him!" I narrowed my eyes and growled. "He says he fucking loves me, but in truth, I'm just his fucking fuck buddy when the old bastard gets horny!"

Deidara cringed.

"I want to actually go to bed with him sometimes. The only time I ever get to sleep next to him is after fucking pounds my ass!" Another cringe. "Sometimes, I just want.. I just want to- Mmmmph!" I slammed my hands over the one hold my mouth shut. "Mph mmph ffmph!" I clawed at the hand, not being able to see who it was, as the asshole was behind me. I was suddenly picked up, and being thrown over someone's shoulder, I hit the back of the guys back and felt something wrap around my arms holding me still.

"Shut. Up." Kakuzu? I looked at the ground and pouted under his hand (which was no longer attached at his wrist). I heard a door open and then shut, rather gently for his bitch ass, and surprised when it didn't fall off from my previous slamming. I was sat down on the bed, his arms going back into place. I looked at the ground, anything but him, and noticed the money was still on the floor. The bills were even crumpled still. I notice the bed shift as Kakuzu leaned down on one knee and hover over me.

I refused to look at that asshole. I don't want shit to do with him. He tilted my chin up, but I kept my eyes closed.

"Hidan." I huffed. Not gonna get me, asswipe. He ran his thumb over my cheek making me realize it was wet. I felt my cheeks heat up. "Why are you crying?" His deep voice was soft (for fucking once) and gentle. I narrowed my eyes at him.

"You fucking heard it all! You know exactly why!" He sat on the bed next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him. "Get off me, bastard! You're just doing this because you feel sorry for me!" I tried pushing him away, but I felt to weak to really try. Not that that asshole needs to know that..

"Hidan." He turned my head to his, pressing his mouth against mine. You know, I didn't even care at this point. I just fucking wanted him to see me as something other than a piece of meat to beat. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him back. We kissed for a while before slowing down to a stop.

"You're a fucking asshole, I hate you. You always do this to me," I said, holding onto Kakuzu tightly.

"And yet you always come back."

"You fucking force me!" I yelled. He cracked a smile. I loved when he smiled. The stitches stretch a little. It's fucking cute. "Bitch."

"I love you, too," he said, patting my head. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me down, holding me as that asshole pulled the blanket over us. I gave him the finger and he closed his eyes and fell asleep next to me.

Maybe I'll piss _on_ his pillow, too, just for the fun of it.

Dafuq did I just write? Well, this is.. interesting. I love Hidan and Kakuzu. They act like they hate each other, but they're so in love. :) They just don't know how to express it. Or something xD Well, that was cute, right? Review? Rate? Please? I'd really really like it if you did c:

I'll be posting more soon enough. :) so stay tuned! :D


	2. Video Games

_Two gave me the idea to turn this into a one shot collection, so thank you both for the idea, I really appreiacte it!_

_These will consist of short little one shots of Kakuzu and Hidan through their relationship in all their awkward situations and such._

_Taking requests for situations in this story, leave your request or suggestion in a review and I'll try my best to do them all! Thank you!_

_Please review and enjoy!_

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Hidan sat on the group, legs crossed, with a game console controller in his hands. He looked up at the big tv screen, his tongue sticking out in full concentration. Kakuzu sat on the couch behind him reading a newspaper and drinking his morning coffee.

"Ah ha! Take that you bitch!" Hidan yelled, waving the controller in the air with a grin plastered on his face. "Bitch doesn't know what hit her!"

"Shut up, I can't read with you yelling," Kakuzu said, turning the page. Hidan paid to attention to his partner as he smashed the buttons on the controller down hard, moving his arms as if it'd help him win the game.

"Haha, fuck yeah! Who won again? I fucking did, that's who!" Hidan laughed and continued slamming his fingers down on the poor controller buttons. Kakuzu sighed and sat his coffee down.

"Hidan, I said shut up," he growled at the religious man. Hidan slummped his shoulders, paused the game, and turned to the stitched man.

"I heard you, ass wipe. This isn't as easy as it looks," he said, sticking his tongue out.

"It's a game. It can't be hard," Kakuzu said back, looking at his paper again. Hidan snorted.

"Wanna give it a fucking try? C'mon go against me, you pansy." Kakuzu glared at his partner and thought it over for a moment.

"Give me that other controller," he shot back. Looking momentarily surprised, Hidan grinned and handed Kakuzu the other controller. "How do you use this thing?" Kakuzu said holding it upside down. Hidan laughed and went to start the game on two player mode.

"Turn it around, fuck face. We're going to fight each other, okay? This one is punch, jump, block, kick, and use this to move," Hidan said pointing to the buttons. "And then there's ones where you push them in a certain order and you can use combo moves and stuff but you have to figure that shit out by yourself," he said laughing. "Be prepared to get your ass kicked!"

Kakuzu glared at the silver haired man and then the controller. Hidan started the game as Kakuzu was trying to remember what Hidan had told him. Hidan's character ran at Kakuzu hitting the other. Kakuzu noticed his little health bar went down. Hidan continued to beat Kakuzu's character up while Kakuzu pushed any button that looked good.

"You're totally getting the shit beat out of you!" Hidan laughed. Kakuzu growled and started pushing the buttons faster and in random order. His character on the big screen then backed up, opened his palms, and shot a big laser from his hands and at Hidan's character, who flew back and it the edge of the screen. "Hah!" Hidan stared at the screen in shock as Kakuzu started using all sorts of combo moves on him. "If that's how you want it to be!"

The two shot lasers at each other, though Kakuzu realizing you can jump to avoid them, among other combo moves such as flying through the air to kick the other, hitting the other multiple times, and sliding on the ground to trip the other for a chance to get a free shot in. Soon enough, Kakuzu was winning. The screen dimmed as Hidan and Kakuzus' characters were shown in a spotlight.

"What!" Hidan yelled as his character hung his head while Kakuzu's still remained in a fighting stance. "Defeat him!" Was shown on the screen in what looked like blood as Kakuzu shot a laser at Hidans character, whom fell over and remained on the ground. Kakuzu's character stood in victory, rasing one fist to the sky.

Hidan sat there dumbfounded as Kakuzu smirked under his mask.

"Ahem. Now who said this wasn't as easy as it seemed?" Kakuzu commented. Hidan turned and faced Kakuzu, his cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

"Shut the hell up, old man! Beginners luck!" Kakuzu scoffed.

"Are you sure you just aren't as good as you thought?" Hidan threw the controller on the ground and got up, stomping away.

"Fuck you, I quit!" Kakuzu waited until he knew Hidan was gone before let out a small laugh. Even in videogames Kakuzu could beat the silver haired man.


	3. What's Today, Again?

_Thank you for the reviews. faves, and followers! I'd if more of you commented on it a bit more! _

_Ideas would be great, you guys! If for nothing more, just leave me an idea if you'd like to see something._

_Thank you, though, those of you who left suggestions. You know who you are. c;_

_This story will updated fairly quickly. Possibly multiple times a day. These are quick to type. _

_**Remember this is rated M for a reason!**_

_Enjoy!_

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"I said no!" Hidan yelled at the masked man. He slapped the wondering hands away from him, got off the bed, and glared at his partner, Kakuzu.

"Why not?" Kakuzu growled.

"Because I fucking said so!" Hidan shouted. Kakuzu sighed and rubbed his temples. All he wanted was some good 'ol sex but no. Of course not. Hidan, for what ever reason, wanted nothing to do with him. "Apologize." Kakuzu stared at Hidan.

"For what?" He asked, completely serious. Hidan narrowed his eyes.

"You're fucking impossible!" He stormed out the room, slamming the door. Kakuzu rubbed his forehead thinking what he _possibly _could have done to upset him this much to the point of not even getting to touch him.

Kakuzu leaned against the headboard, thinking of everything he'd done up until last night.

"Last night.. all we did was sleep. He was fine then. So it must have been something today.." Kakuzu laid his head in his hands thinking back to this morning. "We took that shower together.. he was fine then, too."

He laid down, running his hands over the queen sized bed.

"We had breakfast, he was talking loudly, per usual, so it's nothing I did then.." the man groaned. All he wanted was some sex! What's wrong with that? Nothing, he thought. But apparently Hidan thought something was very wrong with it.

Kakuzu stood up, slung his cloak on, and walked down the hall to Deidara and Sasori's room. He didn't even bother knocking, just walked on in.

Deidara and Sasori both looked up.

"Hey, un, we could have been naked! Knock next time, yeah?" Sasori hit Deidara upside the head and glared at the blonde while Kakuzu cringed.

"Shut up, you. What do you want, Kakuzu?" Sasori asked eyeing the man.

"I need to talk to Deidara. Unfortunatly." Kakuzu pulled the blonde to his feet and took him out into the hall.

"Hey hey hey, watch the hair!" Deidara said pulling pieces of hair out of Kakuzu's grip.

"What's the matter with Hidan?" Kakuzu nearly growled. Deidara thought for a moment.

"What do you mean? He was fine earlier, un." _Aren't these two best friends? Why doesn't he know!_

"Hidan is denying me sex. He wants me to apologize for something, but I haven't a clue what for. Do you know anything? Has he said anything to you?" Kakuzu asked, his eyes narrowed (more than usual). Deidara made a disgusted face and thought.

"Oh, yeah, un. He did say something. You're a real ass for forgetting, you know," Deidara said.

"Forgetting what!" Kakuzu nearly yelled.

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It was late when Kakuzu returned back to base. He had a small box in his Akatsuki cloak pocket. He sighed to himself. He really was an ass, as Deidara had said earlier. He walked into his shared room with Hidan, the silver haired man sitting on the bed.

"Well, it's about damn time you got here. Where have you been?" Hidan asked, glaring at the older man. Kakuzu ignored him and sat on the bed next to him.

"Look.. Hidan," Kakuzu started out. A silver eyebrow was raised.

"Go on." Kakuzu sighed.

"I'm sorry.. I forgot today was your birthday," Kakuzu said, looking at Hidan. Hidan almost smiled. "And I got you something to make up for it." Hidan's eyes widened in surprise as Kakuzu pulled out a little box from his pocket.

"I didn't mean you had to go spend your precious money on me, you douche," Hidan said as he took the box. He opened it to find a new Jashinism necklace charm.

"Yours was getting old, so I thought I get you a new one," Kakuzu explained, watching Hidan replace his old charm with the one Kakuzu got him. He set the old one in the box, closed the lid, and set it in the top drawer of their nightstand.

Hidan smiled at Kakuzu for first time in hours and hugged the older man tightly.

"Thank you, Kuzu," he said. Kakuzu slid his arm around Hidans back, pulling him onto the olders lap.

"I aplogized," Kakuzu stated. Hidan smirked and pulled Kakuzu's head gear off and kissed him with bruising force, just how they liked it. Kakuzu nearly ripped Hidan's cloak off, tossing it across the room carelessly, his hands roaming over Hidans toned chest and abs.

Kakuzu ran his thumbs over Hidan's nipples, the silver haired man moaning lightly. Kakuzu pushed his tongue into Hidan's mouth, sucking on the mans wet appendage.

Hidan pushed Kakuzu's own cloak off and rubbed hard at the growing errection the man was sporting. Kakuzu growled and pushed Hidan on his back nipping at his neck and grinding against the younger hard, hovering above the man. Hidan moaned, telling him to hurry it up.

Kakuzu pulled Hidans pants and boxers off in one swift motion, shoving a finger into his awaiting ass. Hidan moaned again, leaving bite marks on Kakuzu's neck and shoulders while he worked him out of his shirt and own pants.

"Kuzu, just fucking take me dry and now!" Hidan moaned pushing his ass against Kakuzu's fingers. Kakuzu flipped Hidan over on his hands and knees, stitches coming from his arms and holding the silver haired man in place. Hidan moaned as Kakuzus stitches wrapped around his thighs, pulling his legs apart for Kakuzu to enjoy to the view.

He didn't look long, though. He plunged his rock hard erection into Hidan, letting out a low moan as Hidan jerked slightly and rocked his hips.

"Kakuzu, fuck me already, you piece of-_ohh fuck!_" Kakuzu had pulled out and slammed right back into Hidan, hitting that special sweet spot. Kakuzu growled and slapped Hidans ass hard and pounded him into the matress.

Kakuzu's stitches came out of his body only to jerk Hidan off as he moaned loudly every time Kakuzu moved the slightest bit inside him. Hidan felt his legs being pushed apart further, Kakuzu going even deeper inside Hidan.

"Oh, fuck yeah, oh _Kakuzu!"_

Kakuzu groaned quietly as he abused Hidan's poor ass. Hidan, however, didn't seem to even mind as he was getting pleasure from the fron and the back. The tenticle like stitches sped up, jerking his weeping member at an unhuman pace while Kakuzu slammed him from behind as hard as he could.

It wasn't long before Hidan nearly screamed Kakuzu's name and came on his stomach and the bed. Feeling Hidan tightening, and hearing his name being called out like that, Kakuzu didn't last much longer after that. He shot his seed inside Hidan and rode out both their orgasms.

When they both calmed down, the stitches retracted back to Kakuzu, Hidan falling over on the bed. They both were breathing hard. Kakuzu pulled his pants on before getting a wet towel and cleaning Hidan up.

"Oh, Jashin. It hasn't been that fun in a while. Maybe I should I should deny more often, hmm?" Hidan said, curling up to Kakuzu on the bed.

"Don't even think about it." He sighed as he wrapped his arms around the smaller male, bringing him closer. "Happy birthday, Hidan," he said, but Hidan didn't hear him. He was already asleep. Kakuzu closed his eyes and fell into a peacefull sleep aswell.


	4. Pain

_Thanks for the reviews, everyone! They really help me keep writing c:_

_I find it quite funny that all the suggestions are sex based. You guys make me laugh c':_

_Enjoy, please review with suggestions! Thanks for reading everyone!_

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Of course. Of. Fucking. Course.

There just _had _to be no time to sleep. There just _had _to be a mission at four in the _fucking _morning. There just _had _to be ANBU waiting for them. They just _had _to be anbushed and forced to retreat back to base. Of course it was a _fucking _trap.

Hidan was pissed, to say the least.

He and Kakuzu had been sent on an early rise mission. Which would have been fine if he had gotten any sleep. But he hadn't. Leader had sent them on a mission to get information on a mysterious scroll that had sparked his attention. After getting to the scedueled area, they were ambushed by ANBU forced and were forced to go back to base. Now wasn't the time to fight, Kakuzu had said, pulling Hidan along quickly. They had sent clones off in the other direction in hopes to trick the Anbu. It worked, of course, but that didn't mean they didn't set up a trap for them as well.

After sending clones in every direction, and hiding afterwards, the Anbu split up to find them. After knowing they were alone, the zombie duo ran back to base. Or, tried to, anyways.

Hidan's foot caught a small, nearly invisible rope and he fell face first into the ground and then into a pitfall trap fifty feet below the ground. Before he had time to react, Kunai shot at his back, legs, and arms, thirty or so stabbing the pale man. Kakuzu, knowing they needed to leave the scene as fast as possible, shot his hands down the hole, grabbing Hidan, and ripped his body up to the surface.

Hidan, screaming mountains of curse words as loud and obsene as he possibly could, realized his cloak was torn into pieces around him and looking back, all over the ground. With all the kunai in his knees and legs, really couldn't walk without ripping them out, which was time consuming. So Kakuzu had grabbed the cursing man, thrown him over his shoulder, and ran as fast as he could back to base.

Once reaching the base, after setting Hidan down in their makeshift hospital room, Kakuzu told Leader of the mission. After a long silence,

"Thank you, Kakuzu. Please, tend to Hidan so he will shut up." and just like that, Leader went back to pretending the others didn't exsist. Kakuzu sighed mentally and went to see Hidan.

"You fucker! Get these goddamn kunai out of me!" Hidan screamed, not being able to reach any. He lay on his stomach arms and legs outstretched. Kakuzu walked over and started ripping the kunai out of his partners body. "Fuck! Could you be a more fucking rough? Ow, _shit_, I was kidding!"

"Will you shut up already?" Kakuzu growled ripping another out.

"You get fucking pelted with thirty Jashindammed knives and tell me it doesn't hurt!" Hidan yelled at him. After disposing the blodied kunai, Kakuzu sat down and poured anti infection medicine all over Hidan's body (to which he cursed even louder at from the pain), and sewed Hidan shut in various places on his arms, legs, and back.

Hidan rolled his shoulders, popping them. He then did the same with his back and legs.

"Ahh, feels so fucking good to move again!" He said stretching, his foul mood disappearing. Kakuzu sighed and rubbed his forehead. _This guy is an idiot. _"What'cha thinking about, eh?" Hidan asked, kicking his feet.

"You not being able to talk."

"What? Fuck you, you love hearing my voice, don't you, Kuzu?" Hidan said, his eyes sparkling. Kakuzu glared at the religious man.

"I'm going to sew your damn mouth shut and kill you," he said. Hidan laughed and hugged Kakuzu around the waist quickly before getting up.

"Good luck with that, you old bastard," he said, walking to the door. Just before leaving he said, "And thanks." After Hidan was gone, Kakuzu let out another sigh.

"At least he stopped screaming."


	5. Field Trip

_Thank you my lovely reviewers! You make me a happy girl :3_

_Leave a review, suggestion, request! Most likely will be used! Thank you for everyone who reads this! _

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"Are you fucking kidding me?" Hidan asked, staring at Leader. Kakuzu, though in a normal situation unlike this, would have hit Hidan upside the head had he said such a thing to Leader, had to agree with Hidan this time,. "This is a fucking joke, right?"

"Not at all. Here's your.. assignment. Get going. Oh, and make sure to not draw attention to yourselves." Leader said, sticking a sticky note on Hidans forehead. Before Hidan could rip the paper to shreds and piss Leader, and himself, off, Kakuzu grabbed Hidan and left the room quickly to go change. Kakuzu did a few handsigns and his stitches disappeared as the smoke cleared from the jutsu. Hidan just went shirtless (both left their headbands off).

"What kind of fucking "mission" is this supposed to be?" Hidan yelled as the two set off for the nearest town. "Go to the fucking store? The hell? We're criminals, not mothers!" Hidan screeched as they walked.

"Look, I'm not exactly sure why he sent us to do this, but would you shut up and deal with it?" Kakuzu said in annoyance. Hidan huffed.

"Fuck you, this is shit!" Kakuzu sighed and picked up his pace, tuning Hidan out as he normally did when he wouldn't shut the hell up. Soon enough the zombie duo arrived at the store. Glancing at the sticky note, Kakuzu squinted at the bright lights.

"Well, what first?" Hidan asked, crossing his arms. Kakuzu looked at the paper.

"Bread?" Kakuzu glanced around the store. Where is bread? He glanced at the isle descrips hanging from the walls and found the bread isle. He dragged Hidan to the isle, looking at the bread.

"So.. which one do we get?" Hidan picked up a package. "Look this one has green shit on it!" Hidan said with a smile. "That's good, right?" Kakuzu nearly face palmed.

"That's called mold, and no, it's not good," he said, taking the bread away from him and buying the cheapest one he could get his hands on. Hidan bitched and complained the whole time they were at the store while Kakuzu carried all the things they needed. They finally got to the bottom of the list.

"Ew, what the fuck! This wasn't a mission to get fucking food, he tricked his! That bastard tricked us!" Hidan shouted for the whole world to hear. Kakuzu growled and smacked the back of his head.

"Shut up, we don't need attention drawn to us, you idiot." Kakuzu grabbed the sticky note and read the last thing on the list. "What the...?"

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"Thank you, boys. I couldn't have done this without you," Leader said with a smirk clear on his face and amusement in his voice. Kakuzu and Hidan slammed the box of tampons on his desk, both glaring at the pierced man. They left the room and headed to their own.

"Jashin, I'm so glad I'm gay," Hidan said shuddering. Kakuzu smacked Hidans ass. He was glad, too.


	6. How I Feel

_Fluff chapter because most KakuHida stories are about rape and sex D: So Hidan is OOC. But that's okay c: He's also younger than he normally is. This is only after a short time of being partners. So he's young. :3_

_Reviews are lovely, thank you everyone! Still taking request, you know!_

_Thanks for reading, please enjoy!_

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"Kakuzu." The zombie duo were returning from a bounty hunt, Kakuzu carrying the heavy brief case of money tightly. Hidan walked behind the money hoarder, his hands behind his head.

No answer.

"Kakuzu!" Hidan chanted out his partners name, waiting for a reply. But none came. Hidan sighed and thought a minute. He ran in front of his partner, extending his arms out so he couldn't pass him. Kakuzu stopped and sighed.

"_What_, Hidan?" Hidan swallowed thickly.

"Tell me how you feel," he said, looking at the taller man.

"I feel like killing you. Move." Kakuzu pushed past Hidan and continued walking. Hidan sighed and thought again. He followed Kakuzu closely, thinking of a different approch.

Hidan stayed quiet the rest of the night, following his partner. _This is extremely rare of him_, Kakuzu noted, not remembering a time when his partner wasn't talking or cursing non stop. He turned his head back slightly, stopped walking and looked to see what Hidan was doing.

Hidan was such in deep thought he bumped right into Kakuzu. He stummbled a little before looking at Kakuzu.

"Hey, the hell was that for?" He didn't sound as angry as he would, though, Kakuzu also noticed. He decided to ignore it and kept walking_. It was also strange he was even thinking so deep. Or thinking at all_. Kakuzu almost snorted at that. "Kakuzu!" Hidan suddenly shouted. Kakuzu sighed. _The silence was nice while it lasted._

"What, Hidan?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at the religious man.

"Tell me what you think of me!" Kakuzu rolled his eyes. This again? Hidan had recently been asking this quiestion non stop. Kakuzu had decided to ignore him. What he thought was no business of his. "Please, just tell me once and I won't ask again."

"Annoying. Iditotic. Loud mouthed. Irritating." Kakuzu continued walking.

"Fucking thanks." Hidan rolled his eyes. "Want to know what I think?" Hidan asked running to catch up with his partner.

"No." Kakuzu stepped over a branch that had fallen from a tree and onto the path. Hidan jumped over it.

"Kakuzu, I want you to know!" Kakuzu sighed again. _Why couldn't he go back to being silent? _Kakuzu kept on walking, not really caring what the silver haired man thought of him. "I promise to shut up the rest of the way back to base." That nearly stopped him in his tracks. _Nearly_. Hidan not talking again? Kakuzu kept on walking. "You're so damn impossible. What if I help you catch more bounties?" Hidan said, leaping in front of the other man. "Without trying to get rid of those fucking disgusting bodies?" Hidan turned his nose up. But it would be worth it in the end to have him finally know.

That caught his eye. That meant more money. Money was good.

"Fine. Tell me already." Kakuzu stood in place and waited for Hidan to talk. But he didn't. Hidan finally smiled and stepped in front of Kakuzu and stood on his tip toes and pressed his lips to Kakuzu's clothed ones. Hidan lingered there shortly and backed up. He smiled.

"_That's _how I fucking feel." Hidan turned around and walked quietly back to base as promised, though this time leading the way. Kakuzu stood there, though, almost confused. He thought it over and by the time they reached base, Kakuzu decided he was _almost _glad Hidan felt that way.


	7. I Do Care

_Thanks for the reviews!_

_These will be continued until I run out of ideas so, hopefully these will last a while c:_

_Thanks for reading, still asking for requests, enjoy!_

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Kakuzu couldn't help it. He just had nothing else to look at. Or so he told himself, anyways.

On the nights he couldn't sleep, he'd lean against the headboard of he and Hidan's shared bed, and watched the smaller man sleep. He wathced the way his chest rose and fell with each breath he took, he watched his eyes move, knowing he was dreaming. He wondered what he saw in his dreams, but never asked. He looked at how he'd always be curled up against his leg if he were sitting up, and if not, his arm. He noticed that he had a calmer expression in his sleep. Maybe just because he had nothing to scream at or anything to curse to.

Kakuzu ran his thumb along under his eyes, over his pale cheeks, under his plump lips, across his jaw. He'd trace down to his neck, usually marked with love bites and such, then back up and over his mouth. Kakuzu thought back to when Hidan told him it always felt cold when they kissed.

Kakuzu had asked why it felt that way. Hidan had then pulled that mask down, kissed his bare lips, and traced the stitches on his face.

_"Wasn't that better?"_ He had said. Kakuzu felt his eyes drop a little. He was getting sleepy. But he could hold off a little longer. He did, though, find it better without the mask. Though he didn't just take it off for anyone.

Only for Hidan.

But that's just because he liked to see them. That's all.

And he only looked at Hidan because he was the only thing _to _look at. Nothing more.

Kakuzu slipped under the blankets, Hidan automaticlly searching for the bigger warmth. His pale arms went around Kakuzu's tan chest and arms. Scooting closer to the religios man, pulling him close, he thought, _just because he looks cold._


	8. Hidan Doesn't Always Lose

_Thank you, my gorgeous reviewers! You're all quite lovely c:_

_This is SO different than what I usually do. SO different, but needs major improvement. So here we are. I hope it makes sense? Haha /shot_

_Please enjoy!_

_Review, request, thanks for reading!_

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"Alright, you both know the rules. No cutting his head off without sewing it back on." Deidara glared at Kakuzu. "And no going for his hearts, un." He glared at Hidan. "If Kakuzu gets caught in your curse or he is unable to fight, you win, Hidan. If Kakuzu beheads you or are unable to fight, he wins. You can start now," he told the zombie duo before walking a few yards back to watch with a few other members to be safe from getting his own head cut off.

Hidan first drew his own blood, making his signature Jashinism sign, in blood, on the ground.

He grabbed his three bladed scythe, giving a swing, before pointing it at his partner, whom was a at a distance from the other.

"You're going down this time! Kakuzu!" Hidan smirked, taking off at full speed at his partner, his scythe dragging in the dirt and Kakuzu stood were he was, waiting for Hidan to get within reach.

Taking his scythe in both hands, Hidan jumped in the air, bringing it down aimed at Kakuzu. Just as he was about to hit him, though he knew he wouldn't, he reached for his pike, extending it as Kakuzu hardened his arm to block Hidan's scythe. Bringing the tripple-bladed weapon down on Kakuzu's arm, as his feet touched the ground, he swung the pike, aiming for his partners side.

Kakuzu's hardened arm easily stopped the scythe from doing any sort of damage. He did, though, see Hidan extending his pike and hardened his other hand, blocking that as well.

Hidan brought his feet up, pushing against Kakuzu's chest, flying backwards, retracting his scythe. He stood a few feet away from Kakuzu, who was still standing in the spot they started in. Hidan glared slightly at his partner before taking off at full speed once again, though this time running to the side of the stitched man.

Kakuzu watched Hidan, waiting to see what his idiot partner was going for. He watched as Hidan ran behind the tree Kakuzu stood behind. Kakuzu looked up and to his sides. Though he called Hidan reckless and stupid, he knew how to fight. Even if he wasn't the sneakiest for quietest of people.

Hidan sat in the top of the tree, setting his plan in action. He taped paper bombs on the back and sides of the tree as he ran up a moment earlier. He was sure Kakuzu was aware of this. He afterall, was quite the observant man.

Hidan put three more on his scythe, one on each blade. Jumping down from the tree in front of the taller man, he set off the paper bombs, smoke covering the area.

Kakuzu had indeed heard Hidan slap the bombs on the tree. He backed away from the tree, but still in the smoke. Squinting into the smoke, Kakuzu kept his senses sharp and listened for Hidan's loud foot steps.

Hidan, however, wasn't on the ground. He had ran up the tree as it exploded, jumping off at the last second, flying to Kakuzu while he moved into the smoke. Laughing as he came down, Hidan aimed his scythe at Kakuzu and swung.

Hearing his partner laugh, he turned around to see Hidan flying at him with his scythe being swung right at him. Jumping back again, Kakuzu saw the smoke bombs attachted to the tripple-bladed weapon. Narrowing his eyes, he ran straight for Hidan as he landed on the ground.

Hidan grinned as he saw Kakuzu run to him. He jumped over Kakuzu swinging the scythe as he did a front flip in the air, his blade swinging as he did, aiming for Kakuzu as he turned to see what the religious man was doing. Hidan nearly hit him, but not quite. He set the paper bombs off then, smoke filling the air once again.

He landed and shot into the smoke, swing his blade around, aiming for where ever his partner might be.

Kakuzu hardened his fist, punching Hidan in the back. He hit the ground, rolling out of the smoke and landed on his back.

"Che, how'd you find me?" Hidan wondered aloud as he got up. He popped his neck and saw Kakuzu as the smoke cleared once again.

"You're too loud," Kakuzu said, dashing at the Jashinist. Hidan grinned and ran back at him, Kakuzu's hardened fists smashing against the blades of the scythe. Swinging his leg out, Hidan attempted to kick Kakuzu in the shin. Kakuzu glanced down, jumping before the foot made contact with him. Hidan took the time to swing once again at Kakuzu while he was distracted for a split second.

Kakuzu looked back up just before Hidan's scythe made contact with his cheek and ducked. Hidan swung it around, Kakuzu jumping over it to avoid being slashed. Kakuzu kicked his leg up, hardened, making the second swing of the scythe fall to the ground as it made contact with his leg.

Hidan growled and charged at his partner, scythe in hand once again, and jumped up in the air, slashing from side to side as he did so. Kakuzu jumped a few feet back, as did Hidan when his attack failed.

Hidan watched Kakuzu stand there like he hadn't even been bothered at Hidan's attacks. Which, well, he probably hadn't. Hidan grinned as he came up with an idea, mounting his scythe on his back, pulling his pikes out. He extended each of them and ran at his partner.

Kakuzu nearly sighed. Fighting with Hidan always drug on and on. He watched as Hidan run at him, pikes in hand. _What does he think he can accomplish with those?_

Hidan ran, aiming one pike at his stomach, the other at his side. Kakuzu dodged, jumping back from his partner. Hidan grinned and ran at him again, laughing. Aiming for his stomach again, Hidan slashed the other back and forth, Kakuzu just jumping backwards. Kakuzu then backed into another tree, but waited to see what Hidan was going to do as he slowly approched him.

Hidan laughed and threw his two pikes, each missing Kakuzu, but snagging his cloak to the tree. Hidan knew he wouldn't rip the cloak to have to buy another unless he _had _to.

"What're going to do now, Hidan?" Kakuzu narrowed his eyes as Hidan took his scythe off his back and grinned. Kakuzu was about to pull away from the tree, cloak ripping or not, but stopped when he felt the handle of the weapon being pushed up against him where he couldn't move and Hidan's lip over his clothed ones.

Kakuzu, shocked to say the least, didn't move as Hidan ran his tongue over his clothed lips and nibbled at the cloth. Hidan pushed his lips back to Kakuzu's and moaned quietly, seductively against his covered mouth. Pulling back, Hidan laughed as Kakuzu stood there, almost confused.

"I guess that means Hidan wins since Kakuzu hasn't moved, un," Deidara said, laughing.

Kakuzu later realized losing that way wasn't so bad. He'd get him back later though. They'd just be in bed, not on the training grounds.


	9. Love part one

_Thanks for reviewing, reading, and following/favoriting!_

_There will be two parts to this. :3_

_Please enjoy!_

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Kakuzu ran his fingers through the silver locks of hair, watching as Hidan moved into the touch.

It was nights like these that the two of them really enjoyed. There was no fighting, no yelling, cursing, or even talking. They simply were content with just being near each other.

Kakuzu would never admit it, never, but really did enjoy being partners with Hidan. When they had to camp out in the forests, like now, or in a crappy, but cheap, hotel, it was always better with Hidan there with him.

He ran his thumb over his nose, which crinkled and he couldn't help but faintly smile at that, over his mouth, then back up. Hidan reached up and ran his pale fingers across the stitches that adorned his partners face. He pulled lightly at them, little wires wrapping around his fingers.

Kakuzu watched Hidan's face as his stitches toyed with his fingers, the albino smiling. Kakuzu knew Hidan thought they were "cute", he knew they were one of the things, if not the number one thing, Hidan liked most about him.

Kakuzu listened to the crickets, the leaves blowing gently in the wind. He listened to Hidans even breathing, watching his pink eyes. He ran his fingers though the silver threads once more. His hair was always soft. Even when he slicked it back in the mornings. But he liked it most at night when the gel was gone and his hair flipped over his forehead, spraying over his head.

Kakuzu leaned down and kissed those pinks lips. Hidan pressed back lightly. There was no need to be harshor rough.

He kissed him again before taking his cloak off, laying it on the leaves he sat on, before laying down and bringing Hidan into his arms. Their legs entertwined, Hidan's pale fingers grabbed onto his shirt, pulling just lightly. He always gripped them before he fell asleep.

When his girp faltered, his breathing even, Kakuzu usually fell asleep. But not before Hidan quietly said,

"Love you, Kuzu," before his hands fell and rested on the ground. Kakuzu would sigh before kissing his head and falling asleep as well.


	10. Love part two

_Thanks for the reviews, here's part two c:_

_Enjoy!_

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Kakuzu sighed, the bed creaking as he switched to lay on his side. Hidan's arms went around him, his silver hair falling in his face. He mumbled something Kakuzu couldn't make out before snuggling close.

Kakuzu pulled his mask and head gear off, tossing them to the nightstand. He stared at Hidan's sleeping face, his pale skin, those closed, pink eyes. He sighed again. He did that a lot when Hidan slept.

He looked over Hidan's head to the empty bed across the room; Hidan's old bed before they started sharing one. Kakuzu traced Hidan's shoulder, down his arm, his hand, to those green painted nails. He let his hand rest there.

He wondered when he became a softie for the religious man. When did he start thinking of him, worrying for him, caring for him? When did he start letting him in his bed, into his head, in his-

Kakuzu shook his head. _Not there_. No one should be there. That's a dangerous place to be, a sad place to be. It made him weak. It did make him realize something, though, and that thing wasn't so bad, after all.

He drew his hand back. He'll deny it to the end. He won't admit it, because, well, _there's nothing to admit._

Hidan stirred in his sleep, his pink eyes opening slowly to meet Kakuzu's christmas colored ones. He blinked.

"What's wrong?" He asked the miser. Kakuzu stared into those pink eyes. They were always so soft when he woke up. During the day, they were full of mischief and cockiness. But when the pale man was just waking up, they were so soft and gentle. Kakuzu, though he wouldn't admit that either, loved them.

No, he wouldn't say it. He didn't have a need to.

Hidan searched Kakuzu's eyes before placing a kiss on his lips and smirking.

"It's already obvious, you know," he said. Kakuzu sighed.

"I know." Giving him a kiss back, he closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around the pale form, pulling him close. Hidan nuzzled his head against Kakuzu's chest, his pale arm slung loosely around his waist.

"I love you, too," Hidan said before falling asleep. Kakuzu closed his eyes.

It made him realize he wasn't going to have to be alone. Hidan, no matter how annoying or ignorant he could be, he would always be there.

There was nothing to admit because he already knew. Both of them knew. It just wasn't something Kakuzu was ready to give into yet. But looking down at the albino, he knew he already had.

_I guess it's not so bad,_ he thought before difting off into sleep, his fingers threaded into the silver hair.

Not bad at all.


	11. Meow?

_Does anyone else picture Hidan totally cute and not ripped, while Kakuzu looks, well, like Kakuzu? Hm xD_

_I hope this wasn't dragged out and too long. _

_**For MaidenGrey. I love this woman. 3333333**_

_Thanks for reviewing, please enjoy!_

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Hidan waited patiently on the large bed, kicking his feet out. He looked down at himself, not really sure what possessed him to this. Feeling ridiculous, he sighed. _He better fucking like this._ When he heard the door creak open, he quickly sat up, getting into position. _He'll never expect this!_

Kakuzu had just returned from a small solo mission. When he had walked into base, it was unusally quiet. Normally, you'd hear the two artist fighting over art or "making up" after fighting, but nothing of the sort. Another thing that was strange, he couldn't hear Hidan yelling, screaming, or cursing. He slowly made his way up to his and Hidan's shared room, listening for signs of someone other than him being here.

He hadn't been gone long, anyways. A few hours at the most. It had been a simple mission and Hidan had been here, along with everyone else, when he had left. So where did everyone go?

As he approched the room, he reconized Hidan's chakra. Maybe he was sleeping? As he stepped into the room, the door creaking quietly, he did find Hidan in there, wide awake, in fact. But he wasn't expecting what he saw.

Hidan was sitting on their bed, legs bent and spread out, leaned up against the headboard. But this isn't what got Kakuzu. Oh, no. It was the lilac dress, which would hit him if, he stood, just low enough to hide his pride. Ruffles laced the bottom of the dress, the tops of the white stockings peeking through them. The dress was strapless, his broad shoulders slumped. His hands rested against the sheets of the bed, hiding what Kakuzu wanted to see most. He wore a choker, the same color as his eyes, with a little bell hanging from the front. His hair lay flat against his forehead, just how Kakuzu liked it, and atop his head sat a pair of cat ears. Kakuzu could make out a tail, as well, peaking out from behind him.

Kakuzu stared at the blushing zealot before closing the door, locking it. Hearing that _click_ of the door being locked sent blood right to Hidan's hardening cock. His face lit up more.

"Well?" Hidan said, impatiently. Kakuzu shrugged off his cloak, the garment hitting the floor softly. He walked to the end of the bed, feeling Hidan's clothed feet. The sheer stockings made Hidan look even paler. Kakuzu loved it. Pulling his mask off, he knelt down on the bed.

He ran his hands up his smooth legs, around the outside of this thighs, over his clothed semi-hard errection, making Hidan grip the sheets a bit tighter. He ran his hands over his chest up to his face. Grabbing his cheeks between his hands, Kakuzu crawled on the bed, hovering over the pale man, and kissed him roughly. Hidan wrapped his arms around Kakuzu's waist, pulling him close. Stretching his head as high it would go, Hidan pressed his lips back roughly to the taller mans, Kakuzu's tongue forcefully pushing it's way into Hidan's mouth.

Kakuzu moved his hands from HIdan's pink cheeks to his hair, running his fingers through the silky locks before grabbing them roughly and biting down on Hidan's lip, blood getting mixed with the kiss, which of course, Hidan moaned at.

Licking the others lips one last time, Kakuzu sat up and stared at the panting, blood tainted lips, then the pink eyes full of lust and mischief.

Kakuzu felt Hidan's hands pull the head gear off, watched them toss it to the floor, than felt them run through his own silky threads as they fell around his face and shoulders. Kakuzu leaned down, biting into Hidan's neck, pulling the necklace out of the way, lapping at the blood running down his neck. Grabbing his clothed hips, Kakuzu pulled Hidan onto his lap, taking his place by leaning against the back of the bed. He keeps nipping, biting , and sucking on the white neck, running his hands over Hidan's body, his groin taking pleasure in Hidan's moans, groans, and mewls.

Hidan reached down, rubbing Kakuzu's growing erection. He kneaded at the clothed organ roughly, letting moans slip out when Kakuzu bit a sensitve spot. He felt his partner growl quietly as Hidan roughly felt him up, biting hard onto his most sensitive spot on his neck, the bend of his neck, drawing more blood.

"_Fuck!_" Hidan hissed as the blood ran down his upper chest, staining the purple lilac dress. Kakuzu licked it all up, nipping his way down. His wire-like stitches pulled at the dress, literally ripping it from his body. "Hey, hey, hey, I could have used that again!" Hidan said and he was left naked, save the bright pink panties Kakuzu noticed, and the white stockings. Kakuzu growled once again, pushing Hidan down on the bed, attacking his chest with bites, nips, kisses, and licks, his stitches holding his arms and legs apart.

"I'll get you another one," Kakuzu told him, running his teeth across a perk nipple, Hidan struggling against the wires out of pleasure. He licked a trail down his chest, to the pink panties where Hidan's hardened erection stood out the top of them, pre cum leaking soaking the lace hem. Kakuzu's stitches tightened around Hidan's wrist and ankles, spreading his legs apart further. Kakuzu ripped the underwear off of Hidan, his erection springing upwards. Hidan moaned as the air hit his cock, his cheeks tinted red.

Kakuzu roughly shoved a finger in Hidan, pumping in and out, stretching him out. Hidan's toes curled, his mouth open as Kakuzu shoved in another finger, scissoring and fingering him as hard as he could.

"Fuck, Kakuzu!" Hidan's back arched up high as his partner roughly abused his prostate, jamming his fingers repeatedly in that special spot. Kakuzu deemed his partner ready, and even if he wasn't, he'd do it anyways, shoved his pants down, grabbing Hidan's legs and forcing himself deep in the albino.

"_Shit!_" Hidan hissed, trying to break free of the rope like threads around his wrists. Kakuzu pulled out only to slam back inside the tight heat he loved so much. He grinded his cock inside his partner, rubbing and proding roughly at his prostate. Pushing himself back in, going faster and harder at Hidan's request, the threads realeased Hidan only to go for his weeping cock, tightly jerking the man off.

Hidan's hands went straight for Kakuzu sides, lifting his shirt up slightly, digging his green nails into his ribs and hips, moaning as Kakuzu leaned down once more and drew blood on the pale neck, his teeth stained with the sweet flavoring.

"Kakuzu!" Hidan yelled out his partners name, his toes curling, back arching, nails drawing blood on the sides of the stitched man. His cum shot on his stomach, Kakuzu's as well, and over the threads still teasing his wet and sticky manhood. Kakuzu not long after shot his seed deep inside Hidan, grunting and pulling Hidan into a teeth crashing kiss. After riding out both their orgasms, Kakuzu pulled out, releasing Hidan of any confinements. He cleaned up the panting mess Hidan was, turned the lights out, and covered them both up under the blankets.

"Maybe you should go off on solo missions more often," Hidan said with a small laugh. Their legs entertwined, Kakuzu pulled him close, his legs rubbing against the still clothed ones that were Hidan's.

"Maybe you should dress up more often," Kakuzu grunted out, kissing Hidan softly now. Hidan laughed quietly.

"Maybe," he said, drawing circles on Kakuzu's back around the edges of the masks. Kakuzu sighed contently, before drifting to sleep, Hidan right behind him. But Kakuzu was still aware that Hidan was now drawing hearts around the masks, right before they both fell into a peaceful oblivion of sleep.


	12. Normal

_Thanks for the reviews! _

_Still looking for suggestions. This is getting harder for me to write! D:_

_Please enjoy!_

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"Fuck you!" Hidan yelled, sticking his tongue out at Kakuzu. "I don't give a flying fuck what you think!" He crossed his arms and glared at the taller man.

"It's true, you idiot. Look in the mirror," Kakuzu said, sipping his morning coffee. Hidan scoffed.

"No, you're just trying to piss me off!" Kakuzu sighed. He was always _so_ loud in the mornings.

"Shut up and go look for yourself," he told the religious man. Hidan flipped him off, going to look in the bathroom mirror. A few moments later, Hidan came stomping out the restroom, his eyes narrowed.

"You're a Jashindamned liar!" Hidan screeched, pointing a finger at his partern. Kakuzu rubbed the bridge of his nose. _This guy is an ignorant bastard._

"Go see what someone else says, then. If they agree with me, then I win. If they agree with you, they're an idiot like you," Kakuzu offered. Hidan thought a moment.

"Fine!" He looked around, seeing Deidara enter the kitchen. He was reaching for a cereal box when Hidan spun him around and pinned him to the refridgerator.

"What the-"

"What color are my eyes!" Hidan snapped, sticking his face right up against poor Deidara's. Deidara backed up his head and looked at the silver haired man.

"Um, pink, un," Deidara said, pushing Hidan back.

Hidan flipped Deidara off, turned around and flipped Kakuzu off, and stomped out the room.

"Fuck you and fuck you, too! They're not _fucking _pink!" He shouted, making sure to stomp extra loudly to piss everyone else.

Kakuzu simply sipped his coffee, grabbing the weekly paper. Deidara made himself a bowl of cereal, sitting across from the other Akatsuki member.

"But.. they _are_ pink, un," Deidara commented.

Kakuzu continued reading the paper, ignoring the sound of doors slamming, curse words filling the air, and the childish stomping that all echoed throughout the entire base.

Today was just a normal day.

"Fucking assholes saying they're pink! Fuck them! Fuck all of you! They're not pink!"

Normal indeed.


	13. My Humps ENDING ONE

_Thank you, __**Klopf Klopf**__, for the wonderful idea! _

_**This will have an alternate ending, it will be posted right after this is so you can read them both and not forget what happens. **_

_Thank you everyone else for reviewing, following, favoriting! _

_Enjoy!_

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Hidan whistled.

"Damn, you'd see him?" Hidan said, turning head back to look at a young man who'd walked past he and his partner. Kakuzu turned to look at Hidan, his eyes narrowing.

"What about him?" Kakuzu hissed out. Hidan shrugged and kept on walking.

"Kinda hot, dont'cha think?" Hidan turned to see the boy again. Kakuzu looked forward, not bothering to mess with his idiotic partner. They later passed another man, this one tall and bulky, with a scar running from his eye down to the other side of his chin. Hidan locked eyes with this one, grinning at the man. As they passed him, he said, "Shit, I bet his cock is huge, don't you think?" Kakuzu's eyes narrowed but he kept his mouth shut.

Hidan looked over his shoulder, the bulky man turned around facing him. Hidan waved, winked and turned back around.

"He was totally checking out my ass, huh?" He elbowed Kakuzu playfully. The older turned his head to face the silver haired man.

"Don't fucking touch me," he growled out. Hidan knew he was pissed. Kakuzu rarely cursed unless he was about to lose his shit. Hidan smirked, though, and kept walking along side his partner.

It was nearly dark outside when they stopped in a large forest, making their camp for the night. Kakuzu hadn't said a word to the religious man after the incident in town, and he sure as hell wasn't going to now, either.

Hidan glanced at his partner, grinning mischieviously. As he laid his cloak down to sleep on, Kakuzu being a good few feet away from him, he said,

"Hey, Kakuzu!" He didn't face Hidan. "What did you think about all those guys earlier, hm?" Still no answer. "They were pretty fucking hot, yeah? Like the big one, I bet that guy is amazing in bed! Judging from how tall and muscular he is, I bet his cock is twice as big as yo-" in mere seconds, Kakuzu had his hands around Hidan's throat.

"Do not tempt me to rip your head off and throw you off that cliff, never to be found, or seen again," he growled, tightening his grip. Hidan stayed quiet, not bothering to fight back. "I don't ever want to hear you say _anything_ about another man again, got it?" Kakuzu released his grip on Hidan's neck, the zealot gasping for air, the smirk still present on his face.

"Oh? Are you jealous?" He asked. Kakuzu growled in the back of his throat."Because that's what I wanted from you." Kakuzu faced the pale man, who was rubbing his bruising neck. "I wanted to make you jealous, you old fart." Kakuzu's eyes narrowed again.

"Why would you want to do that?" He pushed. Hidan shrugged.

"Because I wanted to see if you still cared," he said, tilting his head. "You know, I'm not a heartless bastard like you, I actually fucking love you. You haven't showed me you have in _weeks_, Kakuzu. Just because you're busy doesn't mean you have to neglect someone."

Kakuzu sighed. He couldn't tell who was the bigger softie. Him for feeling like a jerk, or Hidan for saying something as ridiculous as that. He rubbed his temples and moved over to Hidan, bringing him into a hug.

"You're a cold hearted, old, piece of shit, cock sucking, nut licking, money obsessed, bastard," Hidan said, hugging him back.

Being out on a lot of missions lately had thrown kakuzu off, especially with Hidan not going on most of the missions with him. He'd taken many side trips for bounty hunts, being gone for days at a time. He should have known Hidan would have been upset. He also should've expected him to have a girly speech to make him feel like an ass, too.

"I love you, too," Kakuzu said, kissing him.


	14. My Humps ENDING TWO

_Welcome to the alternate ending! The last one was a fluffy ending, this one will be.. much different. ;)_

_**MaidenGrey**__-__**This incorperates your idea as well! 33**_

_Please enjoy!_

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_"Hey, Kakuzu!" He didn't face Hidan. "What did you think about all those guys earlier, hm?" Still no answer. "They were pretty fucking hot, yeah? Like the big one, I bet that guy is amazing in bed! Judging from how tall and muscular he is, I bet his cock is twice as big as yo-" in mere seconds, Kakuzu had his hands around Hidan's throat._

_"Do not tempt me to rip your head off and throw you off that cliff, never to be found, or seen again," he growled, tightening his grip. Hidan stayed quiet, not bothering to fight back. "I don't ever want to hear you say anything about another man again, got it?" Kakuzu released his grip on Hidan's neck, the zealot gasping for air, the smirk still present on his face. _

_"Oh? Are you jealous?" He asked. Kakuzu growled in the back of his throat._

Hidan layed on his back, looking at his chipped nail polish. He glanced at Kakuzu who was standing with his back facing him. Hidan could practicly feel how angry he was; and was he enjoying every bit of it.

"You know, Kakuzu," Hidan said. "I bet I could find that guy and have all sorts of hot, sweaty, kinky sex with him. You know he'd do it, too. Did you see how he was checking out my ass? I bet his dick reaches all the way to China judging from how-" Hidan's sentence was cut off, Kakuzu roughly flipping him over on his stomach, pulling him to his hands and knees. Kakuzu leaned over him, pressing his cock against Hidan's ass.

"You want hot, sweaty, kinky sex? I'll fucking show you what it means to do that," he growled. Hidan felt his cloak being ripped off his body, though he could do nothing to stop anything that was going to happen. Kakuzu's threads wrapped around his wrists, holding them to ground, his feet and knees being pushed apart.

"Hey, the hell do you think you're doing?" Hidan shouted half heartedly. He felt his pants being torn to shreds by tiny, whip-like threads brushing against his heated flesh. Hidan felt little stings around his now bare ass and thighs as the threads hit his skin.

Kakuzu stood back and watched the threads whip and hit partners body, leaving little red welps where they touched. He could hear Hidan hissing and groaning, though he knew his partner was enjoying it. A stitch came his from his arm, a rather thick one at that, and moved its way to Hidan's throat, wrapping around the already bruised flesh. Hidan choked as it wrapped tightly around him, the rest of the thick stitch prying Hidan's (willing) mouth open, making him give head to the rope-like threads.

Hidan's mouth, while being abused, tightened as he was forced to take the stitch down the back of his throat, all the while having it wrapped around his neck.

Kakuzu noticed, however, the hard-on his partner was sporting. Two more large threads came his arm. They both rubbed up against Hidan's pale ass, one circling his entrance, the other coming down harshly and smaking against his now red bum. The tiny, whip-like threads were now ghost around his body, a few teasing the albino's nipples, the others still lashing away at his pale skin, leaving angry, red marks in their place.

He could hear Hidan gagging and choking, hear him moaning and groaning. He could see his body shake and turn red. He could see his nails digging into the dirt, his body coated with sweat. He enjoyed the sight.

The thick thread at the back of him finally pushed it's way inside Hidan unprepared. Hidan's scream was muffled, but he was clearly enjoying the abuse; It _was _Hidan after all. Tears slid down his red cheeks as the stitch pounded ruthlessly into his abused ass. Kakuzu noticed it was red, though, when it pulled out only to slam back in. Hidan was nearly purple now from the lack of oxygen, his body was red and swollen in many places. He was bleeding in several spots and his hair was flying back and forth as he was getting pounded from the back. The Jashin charm necklace bounced against his red chest, slapping at his skin.

The thread that was slapping his ass moved away to the front of him as Kakuzu then pushed himself, along with the other rope-like stitch, inside Hidan, loving to hear his muffled screams. The big thread had barely touched Hidan's aching cock before he came on his stomach, the seed dripping onto the drit below them. Crying out again, Hidan felt the sheer pleasure of being pounded by his partner, feeling him grinding hard and deep inside him. Not a moment later, Kakuzu spurted his cum in Hidan. The liquid turned a mixure of pink, red, and white as it leaked from his behind.

Feeling the stitches release his neck, wrists, legs, and thighs, Hidan collapsed on the ground into his own mess, choking and gasping for air. Kakuzu simply pulled his pants back up and retreated back to his spot on the ground, laying a few feet away from the worn out Jashinist, whom was quietly laughing and gasping for air.


	15. Pick Up Lines

_Not really proud of this. Hope you all enjoy._

_Thanks for reviewing!_

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"Hey, Kakuzu!" Hidan shouted, walking behind his partner. Kakuzu paid no attention, just kept walking around fallen tree branches along the path. "I gotta ask, Kakuzu. Are you from outerspace? Cause your ass is outta this world!" Hidan cackled with laughter, nearly tripping over the branches on the ground. Kakuzu ignored him and kept on walking.

Hidan was quiet for a moment, then grinned and whistled a little.

"Kakuzu, you are just how I like my coffee; Tall, dark, and strong," he said, laughing once more. Kakuzu rolled his eyes, stepping over another large branch. "Is that a keg in your pants, cause I'd tap that ass!" Hidan doubled over in laughed, having to stop walking to catch his breath.

Kakuzu sighed. _What an idiot._ He glanced back at his partner, and saw he was a good few feet away. He moved a large tree limb in front of the walk way and stood behind it, smirking to himself.

"There must be something wrong with my eyes, Kakuzu. I just can't take them off you!' Hidan howled with laugher, not watching where he was going, much to his partners pleasure.

"Hidan. You're charming me," Kakuzu holds his arms out. "Come here, these lips won't kiss themselves." Hidan grinned and started walking to him.

"Awww, Kakuzu, I knew you really liked me!" Hidan laughed and as he got closer to his partner, Kauzu's smirk just keeps getting bigger. Hidan jogged the rest of the to meet the tall man, faling to notice what lay in front of him.

Hidan tripped over the large log in the middle of the path. Kakuzu moved to the side, his partner falling face first into the dirt and rocks. Kakuzu continued to walk, Hidan's screams and cursing filiing the air.

Ah, yes. Kakuzu liked that his partner was so oblivious to his intentions. It was to his ammusemt when Hidan fell for the obvious tricks Kakuzu set him up for.


	16. It's All Fun and Games

_Where this came from... I don't even know._

_Enjoy!_

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"Kakuzu!" Hidan comically spun around, pointing his finger at his partner, whom was quietly sitting at his desk, doing calculations of funds and money for the upcoming month for Akatsuki. He paid no attention to Hidan. "Kakuzu! Listen, bastard! I have something to offer you!" Nothing from his partner. "I'll pay you if you listen." Kakuzu's head slowly turned to face him.

"What is it?" He asked. Hidan smirked and crossed his arms.

"I want to have a race with you!" Kakuzu stared at Hidan. "If I win, I get to top you tonight!" Kakuzu nearly dropped his wad of cash.

"What makes you think you'd _ever_ top me? Now pay up," he said, holding out his hand. Hidan, have being prepared for this, handed him a few bills.

"Look, just race me, okay? I think I can really beat you!" He said, sticking his tongue out at the older man. Kakuzu rubbed the bridge of his nose after placing the money on his desk.

"Fine. You're paying me if I win," he said. They made their way to the training grounds, a good few yards away from a large tree.

"Whoever touches the tree first wi- Hey!" Before Hidan had even finished his sentence, Kakuzu was already taking off to the tree, Hidan's grumpy ass in tow. Kakuzu poked the tree, narrowing his eyes at Hidan.

"Pay up." He held his hand out. Hidan flipped him off.

"Fuck you! I didn't even get to finish what I was saying!" Hidan slapped some money in his partners hand. "Hey, get your ass back here, we're not done yet! Fuck you, I'll just keep this money for myself, maybe I'll burn it. Yeah, that's what I thought, fucker." Hidan smirked as Kakuzu turned back around, eyes narrowed dangerously.

"What now?" He hissed out. Hidan dragged his partner all over the base, having different challenges for him, all of which Kakuzu managed to win. However, Hidan's money supply wasn't getting any bigger.

"I'm outta money," he said, crossing his arms. Kakuzu sighed. _About time his games are over. _"But just answer one question for me?" Hidan pleaded. Kakuzu spared him a glance. "Why won't you let me top you?" Kakuzu snorted.

"My dick is bigger." Hidan's jaw nearly hit the floor.


	17. Beating

_I've been wondering if I should do this or not. Change is always good, hm?_

_More like, when should I stop being lazy and sit down and write this? ;_;_

_Please enjoy! Thanks for reading and reviewing!_

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Kakuzu ripped his hand out of Hidan's stomach, blood dripping onto the pale flesh that was the albinos' chest. It rolled down his ribs, staining the white sheets beneath the panting Jashinist.

Kakuzu watched Hidan with mild amusement, as he squirmed. His pale fingers wrapped around Kakuzu's wrist, bring his hand down to his throat. He tilted his head back, and whispered for his partner to rip it open. Kakuzu dug his nails into the pale skin, more blood spilling onto the white sheets.

Hidan gasped as he felt the skin being pulled from his neck. He smiled in pleasure, coughing blood up. It poured from his neck, out of his mouth, down his sides and hips. Kakuzu ran his blood tainted fingers down Hidan's neck, down his chest, leaving a trail of red finger marks. He stopped above his heart, feeling it pulse faster and faster.

Hidan coughed once more, blood splattering around the two. He grabbed the older mans hand and pushed down on. Kakuzu laced their fingers, and with his other hand, he plunged his hand deep inside the mans chest.

Hidan's mouth opened in a silent scream, his weak body arching at the feeling of his heart being grabbed by Kakuzu's rough fingers. He weakly squeezed the others hand.

Kakuzu watched Hidan, feeling the heart beat even faster. He wondered if he took his heart out, would it still beat? Would he feel the heart flutter in his hand forever, or would it slowly give out?

"Take it," Hidan gurgled out, coughing once more. Kakuzu looked from the heart to his lovers face. Hidan was smiling, his eyes closed, though his breath was jagged. He could see the pearl tears cascade down the beautiful face. Kakuzu unlaced their hands, wiping the tears away, leaving a streak of blood on either side of his face.

He placed the beating organ back into its place, threads coming from his body to repair Hidan's torn up body. Pink eyes opened, watching the misers blank face as he worked. Hidan reached for him, finding his hands once more before passing out from loss of blood and exhaustion.

_Would it still beat for me?_


End file.
